Browsing Posts in Mike Bessler

 

 

 

Here are the top three wrestling news stories as of this very moment…

3. WWE news: According to a kayfabe report from WWE, Kevin “Kayfabe” Nash is out of kayfabe action for about 6 kayfabe weeks due to a kayfabe injury suffered at TLkayfabeC. NewsWire Flash-Commentary: Kayfabe.

2. More WWE news: CM Punk retains the WWE Championship, defeating The Miz and Alberto Del Rio. NewsWire Flash-Commentary: Know what’s even better than watching a PPV? Talking on the phone with Akbaz while he watches a PPV. Everyone should try this at least once.

1. Still more WWE news: Daniel Bryan wins the World Heavyweight Championship at TLC. NewsWire Flash-Commentary: Let the CM Punk comparisons begin…or resume…or begin slowly, stop, and then eventually resume.

By the way, there are some great clips from WWE TLC on the newly compiled Botchamania 198.

 

 

 

Here are the top three wrestling news stories as of this very moment…Really.

3. TNA News: TNA’s Jesse Neal has confirmed his departure from TNA. Call it a slow news day, people. NewsWire flash-commentary: Yawn.

2. More TNA, kind of: Melina Perez recently tweeted that she has not signed with TNA as of yet, and she further suggested that no such move is necessarily imminent. I told you it was a slow news day… NewsWire flash-commentary: M’kay.

1. & etc.: Watch for the new trend in which IWC writers pen hopelessly smitten articles comparing Tim Tebow to John Cena and vice versa, ad nauseum. Seriously, folks…We get it. Let it go. NewsWire flash-commentary: Fart.

 

 

 

Here are the top three wrestling news stories as of this very moment…

3.  WWE teases Undertaker vs. Triple H at WrestleMania: It could be good, seeing as how ‘Taker/Michaels II actually lived up to the precedent set by their previous WrestleMania meeting. But then again, calling yet another mulligan for Undertaker’s 20th (and hopefully final) WrestleMania match seems to officially signal that they’re completely out of ideas for the Dead Dude. NewsWire flash-commentary: Sigh.

2.  WWE announces the end of its “Classics on Demand” service: Ostensibly in preparation of WWE Network, this news would be a big deal if the 24/7 service had been more widely available. NewsWire flash-commentary: Pfft.

1.  Hulk Hogan publicly craps on TNA’s roster: Via Twitter, Hogan showered Garrett Bischoff with a verbal rubdown while simultaneously providing a dressing down to other unnamed folks on the TNA roster who, unlike Hulk, can still actually step into the ring and take bumps week in and week out. Rise above the hate, Hulk. NewsWire flash-commentary: Dort.

Here ’tis after a murderously long three-week hiatus, it’s the brand freakin‘ new episode of Mat Minutiae! In this episode, Mike B. all kinds of self-indulgent rigmarole including the all new, senses-shattering Minutiae Syllable Whiskey Triple Threat Trivia Holiday Crap Contest Extravaganza. Also, Mike is joined on the celebrity hotline by someone with a name that sounds an awful lot like “Tevin Backilswainey.” Maybe. You’re just going to have to listen and figure it out for yourselves, okay?

By the way, post your answers to the trivia question in the comments section below. Really, act like you give a damn for once in your life and just do it.

Also, in case anyone is wondering, I’d really like to get a shot at the In Your Head Wrestling Prize Wheel this week.

Pro wrestling’s been around for a long, long time; all told, it’s been something of an institution for a century and a half, give or take a decade or two. And let’s face it: you can’t kick around on the planet for that long without suffering an occasional misstep or two. Of course, every wrestling fan worth his or her laces knows about the biggest boners of the sport: The Shockmaster’s debut, David Arquette’s run as Heavyweight champ and pretty much every angle that included Psycho Sid Justice (or whatever the hell his name was). Well folks, the whole point of Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. is to bring some of the lesser known cow patties of wrestling’s history back into the spotlight for enough of a fleeting moment that we can relive, reflect and then collectively breathe a sigh of relief that better days are here. Kind of.

Half of the Zambuie Express, Kareem Muhammad

Now when I was a kid back in the heady territory days, the Zambuie Express (a.k.a. Zambaui Express) were some of the biggest and baddest dudes around. And while they could have easily made enough of a rep for themselves with their in-ring presence, Kareem Muhammad (Ray Candy, who was New Jack’s Trainer) wasn’t above grabbing some cheap heat now and again. In the early 1980s, Kareem had a memorable feud with up and coming wrestling prodigy Jay Youngblood in which he regularly referred to Youngblood as a “drunken Indian” and made fun of his parents for living on an Indian reservation. Cringe-worthy as it all sounds, this angle was relatively tame compared to Muhammad’s 1985 appearance on Jerry Lawler’s “talk show” a few years later in which he lambasted old school icon Tojo Yamamoto with all sorts of slurs and derogatory comments. (You can view the entire debacle here.) The fact that Tojo sat through all of the ensuing ridiculous showed that he was a tough old guy who loved the business, for better or for worse.

For everyone who complains that wrestling has become far too “politically correct” these days, I’d hope that we can at least agree that this is some pretty stuff that’s better left in the proverbial dustbin of history.

Mark it!

Excerpt source:
Clayton, Donald D. Principles of Stellar Evolution and Nucleosynthesis. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1983. p. 435.

Hot on the heels of the greatest “sixth episode anniversary special” in the history of thebradyhicks.com, this here’s the latest installment of the curious spectacle known to laypersons as Mat Minutiae. In this installment, Internet pseudojournalist Mike B — still basking in the glow of last episode’s symphony of awesomeness — offers a preview of POWW‘s upcoming WrestleRage IX event. He also rolls out a new mini-featurette called “Bootleg Shakedown,” spotlighting the collected matches of the Tommy Dreamer/Raven feud from the heyday of the original ECW. Somewhere along the way, Mike throws out mad props to the likes of In Your Head Wrestling, Mr. Akbaz, Sunday Morning Squash Match and others. Most importantly, Mike interviews Li’L Betsy Bruiser, the youngest female competitor in the history of professional wrestling. Yeah, no kidding.

 

Truth be told, it’s practically a crime that you get this much entertainment for free. You should all be ashamed of yourselves.

I totally want one of these…

Hey hey! It’s the fifth installment of the biggest little podcast in the world of pro wrestling pseudojournalism! Inspired by In the Room’s recent live stream, Mat Minutiae goes “live” this episode and someone actually calls in on the MM Hotline. Can you really afford to miss this episode? The answer is a big, fat, unequivocal “NO.”

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Mike Bessler is back with another installment of Mat Minutiae!  This time, Mike looks at the latest in WWE and TNA trading cards. Also, he shares updates on the state of his  contract negotiations with thebradyhicks.com as well some news on his search for a new sidekick.

Also, the show includes some info on a special new promotion called “Mat Minutiae SweepstakesMania-O-Rama!”

You’d have to be a real ass to pass this one up.  Seriously.