• 3 matches will be spotlighted every Sunday morning based on their nostalgic qualities, their in-ring performances, their campiness, and their performers’ contributions to today’s wrestling world.
• Not EVERY match will be a squash, but it’s always nice to see the fan favorite totally dominate.
• Main event of Squash Match Sunday will normally have a title on the line, and will ALWAYS be a quality wrestling match.

…Let’s get to the action!
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EARLY BIRD SPECIAL

Let’s start off Squash Match Sunday with the most historic squash match in pro wrestling history. You know what I’m talking about…it’s the Fingerpoke of Doom! I apologize for the quality…and the video is kind of bad too.

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MID CARD HANGOVER

Jake “The Snake” Roberts takes on “The Model” Rick Martel in their infamous Blindford match at Wrestlemania VII. This match came about because Martel blinded Roberts with his big cologne sprayer. And no, that’s not what she said.

Things to keep an eye/ear out for:

• This is quite possibly the only tolerable Blindfold match. Honorable mention: Jamie Noble vs. Nidia in a Boyfriend vs. Girlfriend Blindfold match at No Way Out 2004.
• It’s funny to think of Jake Roberts as a fan favorite, as you can see when he’s using the crowd to help find Martel. You rarely see a face these days who are slow, methodical, soft-spoken and carries a large reptile.

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YOUR MAIN EVENT OF THE MORNING

TU evento principal de la noche…whoops…I mean YOUR Main Event of the Morning takes us to AAA Lucha Libre where a 19 year old Rey Mysterio Jr, Heavy Metal and Latin Lover take on Fuerza Guerrero, Madonna’s Boyfriend (Louie Spicolli) and Psychosis in an exciting six man tag team match to cap off your Sunday morning.

Your main event worthy commentary of the afternoon:

• Only Louie Spicolli would have the in-ring name of “Madonna’s Boyfriend”. RIP creator of the Spicolli Driver.
• WWE can learn a thing or two from this match. One of them being to have 2 overweight, suspender-wearing Mexican men as the referees.
• Be amazed at how young these guys are as well as the skill they’re showing off! Marvel at the most anti-climactic ending in pro wrestling history!
• Seriously, I miss WCW’s cruiserweight division so much. Do I mention that enough??

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Well that about does it from my end, enjoy your Sunday afternoon!

SQUASH MATCH SUNDAY

“Featuring wins as easy as Sunday morning”

Hey guys, so I’ve been insanely sick all week and haven’t had the brain power to pick and critique three matches so here’s the very FIRST Squash Match Sunday for your consideration!
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EARLY BIRD SPECIAL

 
Our first match features WWE Hall of Famers Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Sgt. Slaughter teaming up to take on the Beverly Brothers. No witty commentary needed for this match AND it will only waste 3 minutes of your time!

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MID CARD HANGOVER

Our mid card match showcases the cruiserweight division of WCW, where we have Jamie Noble squaring off against Jimmy Yang (both former members of the Yung Dragons). While this match isn’t technically considered a squash based on the equal amount of offense that both these men present in this match, the brief amount of time allotted for the match makes it more than a candidate for Squash Match Sunday.

Things to keep an eye/ear out for:
• A plug for WCW Backstage Assault, the widely panned Playstation game that tried to market off of the hardcore movement that was taking place around that time.
• The god awful WCW commentary team, especially the line “WOAH!!! HE’S PRETTY FLY FOR A WHITE GUY!!” uttered by Mark Madden (I believe). This phrase perfectly describes the vibe of WCW circa 2000.
• “LUGER’S UP TO SOMETHING!!!”
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YOUR MAIN EVENT OF THE MORNING

 
Our main event features Samoa Joe (who was riding his 18-month undefeated streak) and Mr. Wrestling Machine himself, Kurt Angle. This match was a HUGE deal back in 2006 regardless of brand loyalty or how often you watched TNA. Samoa Joe was on a mythical level at this point, and Kurt Angle was (at this point) the hottest free-agent acquisition in TNA history.

Part 1

Part 2

Your main event worthy commentary of the afternoon:

• Good to see that TNA pulled out all the stops by holding this classic main event in the hallowed halls of the Impact! Zone.

• Not sure why Jeremy Borash had to mention that he weighed Angle that morning. I like to think that Angle was weighed that morning by Borash before they went out to the Golden Eagle Diner to split a grapefruit and some whole wheat flapjacks.
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Well that about does it from my end, enjoy your Sunday and as Hacksaw Jim Duggan so eloquently says…..HOOOOOOO!

• 3 matches will be spotlighted every Sunday morning based on their nostalgic qualities, their in-ring performances, their campiness, and their performers’ contributions to today’s wrestling world.
• Not EVERY match will be a squash, but it’s always nice to see the fan favorite totally dominate.
• Main event of Squash Match Sunday will normally have a title on the line, and will ALWAYS be a quality wrestling match.

…Let’s get to the action!
_____________________

EARLY BIRD SPECIAL

“The Juicer” Art Barr takes..on..uhh…what a creepy friggin’ gimmick. Watch some creeper in face paint run around with kids in face paint for your Early Bird Special.

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MID CARD HANGOVER

T.J. Perkins takes on Mr. “Desmond Wolfe” himself, Nigel McGuinness in the Mid Card Hangover match this morning. After all the booze you drank last night, I’m sure your head must feel like you just got hit with Nigel’s “Tower of London” finisher.

Things to keep an eye/ear out for:

• Every wrestler from here on out who is on the receiving end of a wristlock should exclaim “OIIII!” the way Nigel McGuinness does in this match.
• Seems like Perkins got caught in the air for a bit during that frog cross body splash. Because he’s very light, you see!

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YOUR MAIN EVENT OF THE MORNING

Lawrence Taylor and Bam Bam Bigelow headline your SUPER BOWL-themed Main Event of the Morning in a Lumberjack match at Wrestlemania XI. Look out for Steve “Mongo” McMichael as well as other former NFL players who are probably dead broke around now.

Part 1:

Part 2:

Your main event worthy commentary of the afternoon:

• Funny to see Pat Patterson as a ref, and Nikolai Volkoff as a guy at ringside with a cent sign on his shirt.
• Big props to Bam Bam for jobbing to an ex(?)coke addict…then again this IS the WWF in the 1990s.
• Please answer the following question in the comments below: Would you wear a WWF Lawrence Taylor jersey? I know it’s hard to imagine without the bike shorts but you KNOW that would strike up some interesting conversation!

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Well that about does it from my end, enjoy your Sunday afternoon!