Little introduction to this article series:
• 3 matches will be spotlighted every Sunday morning based on their nostalgic qualities, their in-ring performances, their campiness, and their performers’ contributions to today’s wrestling world.
• Not EVERY match will be a squash, but it’s always nice to see the fan favorite totally dominate.
• Main event of Squash Match Sunday will normally have a title on the line, and will ALWAYS be a quality wrestling match.
…Let’s get to the action!
EARLY BIRD SPECIAL
El Dandy…vs David Flair…I SWEAR I don’t hate you guys, but you HAVE to watch this!
MID CARD HANGOVER
Our Mid Card Hangover is the first of two scheduled WWF heavyweight championship matches at Wrestlemania X, as Lex Luger takes on the champion Yokozuna. The winner of this match would go on to face Bret Hart, who lost earlier in the evening to one of his brothers. I think it was Bruce? Or Dave? I’m just kidding, it was obviously Diana Hart.
Things to keep an eye/ear out for:
• Here’s something to keep an eye out for…EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS FOR THE FIRST TWO AND A HALF MINUTES (Rhonda Shear as the timekeeper, Donny Wahlberg as the announcer, Mr. Perfect as the MC Hammer impersonator / guest referee)
• I don’t know what’s more funny: every time Luger fails to slam Yokozuna, or Cornette’s ring attire.
• I’m sorry, I will never get over the fact that Jerry Lawler always wore his tights to commentate for the longest time. I’m pretty sure he didn’t wrestle that night and was STILL not wearing a shirt.
• I love Mr. Perfect’s reasoning at the very end: “That’s my story and I’m ssssssticking to it!”
YOUR MAIN EVENT OF THE MORNING
In honor of CM Punk recently winning the WWE Championship, I thought we could take a straight-edge stroll down Memory Lane and revisit Punk’s early days in ROH. For YOUR Main Event of the Morning, CM Punk takes on Samoa Joe at ROH/TWC’s International Showdown.
Your main event worthy commentary of the afternoon:
• You know, I’ve been looking for my old school WWF wrestling ring for my action figures. Of all places, it’s in England being used for an epic rematch!
• Seriously, how did CM Punk leave this match with his face still connected to his skull!
• Shame this Samoa Joe guy never panned out :(
Well that about does it from my end, enjoy your Sunday afternoon! That’s my story and I’m sssssticking to it!